And luckily for us, New York Magazine has released The Sex Issue. A little of this, a little of that. (And yes, we will probably write another article about one of their features.) Sex: The Multiplicity of Desire, gives us some clues about where to look. But for heaven's sake, don't just read our little synopsis. Treat yourself to the whole article here.
The article profiles those on the prowl in Manhattan - a Meetup group for the (much) older set, online dates going very well, bi and lesbian hook-ups, a couple at a milonga, a stint with two prostitutes, college kids making it happen, an evening at a gay foot fetish party. (Yes, we read EVERY WORD of the ENTIRE article.)
There are also a few places to file away for future visits:
Rebecca's Hidden Chamber is the civilised spot for some exploration into BDSM. Get it line; the word is now out. (And it seems rather 'nice'.)
One Leg Up exists to help you indulge your fantasies. Couples and women are always welcome. Men must come with a female escort.
Sheepshead Bay is the place to go for a (very) short stay hotel (and probably bedbugs). There's apparently one hotel still open, although 2010 saw the closing of a 'legendary' locale. Just wait until Dayuse-Hotels.com comes to NYC. (But really, will they be allowed?)
Kind of reminds us that Puritans settled in the New World first, and apparently are still, somewhat, in residence. Even if they do have more civilised dungeons.